These are not good goals. I don't want to feel safe, I'll never learn that way. The kind of chaos I wish to convey; in fine illuminations - and a resting pace. This is intensely flawed and bleeds its feelings through these seats. Deliberate in each movement and pause, navigating weakness; with a dystopian loss. Tiny lies; with a soft love - I'd rather be alone. Then I’d be happy; then I’d be enough. I am terror, I am absence, I am here for her. I cannot fix this. I want to feel again. My body's failing. I need help.
released August 31, 2018
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